Eating all the things and not feeling bad....yet

I understand eating healthy. The 5 food groups, eating smaller portions, exercise more than you consume. But happiness to me...is gorging on "naughty foods" and not feeling horrible about it until weeks later!

This weekend we made a batch of brownies..those bad boys...goneeee as of last night. Saturday night, we had a whole loaf of garlic bread for dinner. Was it worth it? Hells yes it was. I'm crampy and feel horrible....those foods are bad news bears and made me feel wonderful.

I'm not going to go online and lie to myself and others and say when I eat a salad for dinner I feel super duper and blessed. I feel like a rabbit and sometimes this rabbit needs her a shit ton of brownies and bread.

Will I whine and cry about eating large portions of these foods in a week? Absolutely I will. And when I tell you I feel fat and ugly in a few weeks you can say "GIRL you ate like 5-7 pieces of garlic bread and half a tin of brownies....go work out for a year". I'm fine with that.

But one thing I do know is that I'm healthy for the most part. Yes I have a few rolls I don't really care for. But I eat lots of raw veggies, I love me some fruit, I dig avocado like its a chocolate bar. I feel like you need to treat yourself sometimes. You should go get some sangria and flat bread if you want. Get that giant poutine. Then deal with it after!

I know I want to lose weight, but I know its not going to happen over night and I'll do it on my own time.

I watched this video this morning and a few things she says are things I'm thinking to myself often. Now, she's gained weight because of her battles with an eating disorder. That's a little different from myself BUT this line is kind of how I feel a lot of the time "I don't feel like I love my body yet, but I feel like it's OK, and that's progress for me."

Some days I look in the mirror and think "damn girl you look fly as hell today" other days I point out my flaws. Right now I just want to dress the body I have now, enjoy weekends where I eat horribly and love the company I have.